Twenty Eight.

A few days ago, I celebrated my 28th birthday. I don’t know, maybe its just me, but every time I add another year to my age, the celebrations get more and more bittersweet. In fact, I think the only reason why I even celebrate is so that I don’t drown in the regrets of my younger years. Particularly for this birthday, I had wanted to celebrate despite my current state of financial distress, just so the week wouldn’t be remembered in my book as the week with the major heartbreak from that 10 year pseudo relationship. (More on that on another entry, maybe. Haha.)

Photo 9-26-14, 12 07 13 AM

27 was an exciting/difficult/emotional/liberating year. If you have been with me this past year, you would probably know which parts were exciting/difficult/emotional/liberating. I had a lot of firsts, but there were also lasts. My 27th was mostly a year of goodbyes, with a few hellos here and there.

Last year, I learned —

  1. That failure in one thing does not mean my failure as a person. There is grace in accepting and standing up after a defeat, and that’s what counts more. I learned that it is not the failure that determines what kind of person you are, but how you pull yourself up after falling/failing.
  2. To know and appreciate my worth as a woman. My 27th year has been very emotional in that aspect, and I’m not sure if I’ve fully grasped what it really means to be a woman in this time and age. Suddenly, a new world opened up to me — my principles have been challenged, and new experiences brought upon new problems to (over)think about.
  3. I am more than my hormones (hahaha.) But seriously, I can’t keep making excuses for my attitude. I cannot be catty and sarcastic and blame it on my raging hormones. I must own up to the things I do, and if I don’t want to regret things I’ve said or done, I better make sure I don’t do anything regretful.
  4. To make a friendship last longer, it has to be taken care of. Friends are the family you choose. 🙂

I’m pretty sure there’s more, but I can’t seem to think straight right now. Hahaha.

Now that I’m 28, I wish for love and clarity. Love because it just seems timely,  because of all the heartbreaks of the past months, and clarity so I get to make the right decision about my future. 🙂


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